June 2025
I’ll be honest: I have a lot on my plate right now. Between looking for a new rug and the playoffs, I don’t a have a ton of bandwidth to scour the earth for esoteric wines, or as management calls it, ”do my job”. But as life proves time and again, the simplest option is often the most effective, so I bought a big ol’ bottle of dry, crisp Italian white.
Imagine you’re poolside with your beautiful partner. You’re having a prosciutto sandwich with spread and need a white that compliments the peppery arugula. Lucky you, because Pecorino’s mix of acidity and minerality would pair perfectly. But what if you’re a dullard who struggles to use a wine opener, which makes your partner question a life with you long term? More good news: it’s a twist off. You can continue to live a lie. But what if you’re alone and trying to look attractive? Let me let you in on a little secret: wine is the perfect accessory. It projects an aura of worldly sophistication that, say, a White Claw lacks. Also, look at the size of this lad. You don’t need a full liter – find someone to share it with. |
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